Remembering Ben Moore - Unquestionably One Of A Kind

Virginia, and more specifically Hampton Roads and the Peninsula District, lost one of its treasured coaches on Saturday, December 9, 2017 with the unexpected passing of Ben Moore. It occurred less than 24 hours after he coached his basketball team, the Menchville High boys, against Kecoughtan, which won a close battle 49-45.

Moore had an early practice the next morning so that he could go speak at the funeral of one of his former Warwick players that he coached, Jonquay Byrd, a 23-year-old who died on November 29 due to injuries sustained from a car crash on Jefferson Avenue two days earlier.

By accounts of those at the funeral, Moore was there to give a eulogy. He collapsed at the service held at Ivy Baptist Church in Newport News and couldn’t be revived. The news of Moore’s death sent shockwaves throughout the state, resulting in many heartfelt tributes to a man gone at the age of 61 (see more here).

My prayers and love go out to his family. He’s survived by his wife, Sharon, and two adult children; daughter Candace and son Chris, a current member of Longwood’s coaching staff.

I began writing about High School Sports and High School Basketball here on VirginiaPreps.com in December of 2004. Within the first couple years of covering the Tidewater area, I was privileged to get to meet Ben and be able to form a friendship with someone who was more than just fulfilling coaching duties.

We should all strive to live our life as Ben Moore lived his. He was an extraordinary person.

Writing ‘was’ in the past tense and instead of ‘is’ with him no longer here on Earth seems so surreal. The Queens, New York native certainly had a style and persona that was larger than life. Yet, Ben had the unique ability to speak and connect with people of all ages, races, backgrounds. Not everyone possesses that gift.

Below, we share some personal stories, including some of mine, and a closer look at why Ben proved to be unquestionably one of a kind.

In my 14 years of covering the High School Basketball scene, you encounter many coaches along the way. Some oversell kids in terms of their ability. Some undersell. Others even will speak not so highly of certain players, whether they are individuals who transferred out of a program, play for an opponent or just have a personal opinion on them.

Ben had something positive to say about every player. No, he didn’t always have the supreme difference maker that could direct his team on a path to a State Championship. But he saw the best and potential in everyone; from the go-to guy to the last man on the bench.

“His coaching career embodied his love for kids. I can guarantee you can’t get one kid who would say anything negative about Ben Moore because at the end of the day, that’s a man who had your back,” stated Old Dominion assistant coach John Richardson.

“People flat out loved that man because of what he stood for, and that’s why you hurt because he’s gone too soon. Your sole purpose to get into coaching should be to want to help kids. A selection of kids in Newport News, and even beyond, will be forever indebted to him.”

Jonquay Byrd was a great example of an under-the-radar player who he spoke glowingly of, describing him as, “tenacious, a warrior and one of the quickest players I’ve ever coached.”

During the 2010-11 season, Byrd became eligible the second semester to play and scored 28 points in his first game back, a 54-51 win over Gloucester. Warwick closed the regular season by winning four of their final five games after going on a five-game losing streak.

Ben Moore spent 24 years as Warwick’s Head Coach, also serving as Athletic Director there in 1996-97. He would go on to spend three years as an assistant coach with Dave Macedo at Virginia Wesleyan before returning to the High School ranks, replacing best friend Dennis Koutoufas at Menchville, serving as Head Coach there since 2014-15.

One of the players that most sticks out to me during Moore’s coaching career is guard Breven Lyons, who ordinarily would not find his way on any scout’s evaluation report due to his size, listed at 5-feet-6 inches tall.

As many veteran coaches do, Moore tagged him with a nickname. That moniker that stuck was, “Smooth Operator.” I asked him why. Ben told me, “You remember that song ‘Smooth Operator,’ by Sade? That’s Brev. He’s smooth.”

Coach Macedo saw something in Lyons also. It was the size of Breven’s heart you couldn’t measure. Also, his passion on the court made him successful, some of which was certainly shaped playing for Ben. Lyons quietly bided his time to get on the court. When his turn came, he seized the opportunity.

In December of 2014, Lyons – then a senior for the Marlins – hit a three-pointer with six seconds to go to send the game into overtime against nearby and fellow Division III contender Christopher Newport University. During the OT, Lyons grabbed an offensive rebound with six seconds left and provided the game-winning bucket in a thrilling 84-83 victory.

In one of his final seasons at Menchville, Moore had an undersized group that finished 11-12 overall after going 12-10 in his first year there. But he commented that he was, “impressed with the level of grit, heart and commitment those young men had. They restored my faith that young men still know how to work hard.”

Take Booker T. Washington’s Darren Sanderlin as another illustration. Sanderlin, who won a state title as both a player and later as a Head Coach with the Bookers, played for Moore in the first Boo Williams College Summer League held at Norfolk State’s Echols Hall after he transferred to the Spartans from Virginia State.

There were several standouts, including former CNU great and NBA player Lamont Strothers, among others.

“Sometimes a player can have confidence in themselves. When someone you don’t know instills confidence in you, that’s powerful,” Sanderlin stated. “I remember him saying, ‘Hey man, you can really play this game.’ Ben exuded confidence in me.”

“In this day and time, a lot of relationships are fragile because sometimes kids figure out that you don’t have their best interest at heart. Some kids go through years of playing basketball and really didn’t learn anything. You could never say that with Coach Moore. Life was so much bigger than basketball,” Richardson added.

“He would sit you down if you missed class. There were certain things that he would do to give life lessons that were connected through basketball. We just don’t have enough of that nowadays. It’s all about wins and losses instead of the betterment of people.”

A deeply spiritual man, Ben Moore radiated with faith everywhere he went, and through countless people with whom he encountered.

“I listened to one of his speeches today and it touched me,” remarked Green Run Head Basketball Coach Kenneth Harris after a win over Landstown this week. “He was definitely a child of God.”

There’s no denying that.

“One of the things he always talked about was his love for life and his love for the Lord. Nowadays, basketball is a job or a stepping stone for the next job. But basketball truly was his ministry,” Richardson said.

“People do shy away from it, but he didn’t. He lived his code. Whenever you spoke to him, he was always upbeat. Nothing seemed to rattle him. There were kids who would leave his program. It was one of those things where he would basically pray for them. He just coached the kids that were there, that wanted to be coached.”

Moore, along with Nansemond River Head Coach Ed Young, served as directors of the Hampton Roads Fall League at the Boo Williams Sportsplex. The Fall League would generally run on weeknights, alternating this year on Tuesday and Wednesday nights. Ben’s tireless work and commitment to making sure everything ran smooth made the operation top-notch.

Often, Moore and Young would sit in the lobby after games were over at 10 PM and tally up scores, standings, etc. so that an e-mail blast could be sent out to the coaches to let everyone know where they stand. Even with it nearing 10:30 on a school-night, Moore would be willing to give any player a ride home that needed it because they didn’t have one or any transportation. That’s the kind of guy he was.

There also would be the occasion that Ben would count on Ed (and even sometimes yours truly) to gather the info on nights that he had church before Moore would rush back to the Fall League to take care of one section of the gym. Ed and he would often alternate each hour picking up the scores for the ‘orange side’ and the ‘green side’ of the facility.

Ben served as associate minister at First Baptist Church Morrison in Newport News. Ironically, Moore’s final game as Head Coach came against Kecoughtan, coached by Willie Gause, who followed him as Warwick’s Head Coach upon his departure to Virginia Wesleyan. Gause serves as a youth minister at First Baptist Church Jefferson Park on the Peninsula.

“He told me, ‘Keep inspiring these young people and keep preaching Jesus.’ He gave me a hug and went to the locker room,” Gause told Dave Johnson of the Daily Press (story here). “The last thing he said to me was, ‘I love you. I’m proud of you.’”

Whether it was a family member, fellow coach, player or reporter, it was common to pick up the phone and call Moore. Over the years of knowing him, Ben had a rotation of different gospel songs as his ringtone. One of them I’ll never forget; Marvin Sapp’s, “Never Would Have Made It,” a tune so catchy that it has become a personal favorite of mine – this after being unfamiliar with the artist or song.

Ben Moore, you definitely made it!

“One word – friend.” That’s how First Colonial Head Basketball Coach Mark Butts remembered him on Facebook.

“He touched so many and did it the right way,” Butts added.

On the court, Moore won 288 games as a Head Coach at the High School level.

“It’s not the number of wins… it’s the number of lives he touched,” Koutoufas noted.

Too many to count.

Koutoufas is right. Ben won at the game of life. By the way he conducted himself, interacted with others and was always willing to lend a helping hand.

“It’s more about the kids’ development than the actual winning. If a child develops better character, respect and manners, then you actually won. Ben helped me see that personally,” Sanderlin said.

Those who no longer can seek Moore for words of wisdom have taken his death hard.

“I’ve known him for pretty much 30 years. Our paths intertwined. We formed a strong friendship going back to my days in the 1980’s coaching the Suffolk Red Raiders and he was coaching the Warwick Raiders," Young indicated.

"We didn’t always see eye to eye, which is fine, but his insight helped me immensely. He had so many good stories and we had so many good times. I’ll treasure those for the rest of my life."

Count Richardson among those in reflecting on Moore’s life and impact as well.

“My very first year coaching at Woodside as a junior varsity coach, we weren’t very good,” Richardson admitted. “We finished 5-13. We played Warwick on the last game of the season. That year, Coach Moore was the AD at Warwick. Our kids battled. We were down 20 and even tied the game, but we ended up losing.”

What happened afterwards stuck with Richardson and struck a chord with a man that would go on to guide the Woodside varsity program to back-to-back state titles in 2004-05 before moving on to the collegiate level.

“Emotions were running high because it was the last game of the year and the kids fought their tails off, which Coach Moore recognized. He comes into the locker room and asked to speak to my kids. It was only about five minutes, but he was proud to see how they battled and it meant a lot. Then, he took me to the side and basically told me to keep plugging away,” Richardson remembered.

“At the time, I’m just 23 years old and he’s a giant in the Peninsula District. Craig Davis was the first Head Coach at Woodside and he coached under Ben. So basically me breaking through the coaching ranks, I learned in a way from Coach Moore through Craig Davis. There always has been a bond there, but that moment meant the world to me.”

Sanderlin recalls one of his first years coaching his alma mater. They met up at the King’s Fork Summer League and a compliment Moore gave him sent chills through his body.

“He told me my players were a reflection of me, as a player. Your guys play just like you play,” Sanderlin revealed. “When you’re a young guy and you start coaching, you’re gung-ho. You’re ready to take on everybody. He put his stamp of approval that I could do this. That meant so much to me."

Even more meaningful were the calls unexpectedly to check on how he was doing.

“If everything was going wrong with your life – and sometimes it would be – but Ben was your friend, you were okay because you knew he loved you," Sanderlin continued. "The game has changed. But Ben never changed. He was always infectious with love.”

Early on in my gig covering the old ‘Eastern Region’ as it was known, I’d solicit the opinion of many coaches, off the record of course, on who they thought was the best Head Coach around in Tidewater. There were various answers and a lot of good choices. I never kept an official tally, but Koutoufas was certainly one that seemed to be a popular pick. After all, he went 438-255 in his career when he retired in May of 2014, coming up a victory shy of taking three different Newport News schools to the State Tournament.

Yet, Koutoufas’ admiration for his best friend and former assistant is profound. It’s for the way he helped kids and anyone in need.

“I really envied the things he did,” Koutoufas said. “And forever will.”

Fun-loving with a contagious laugh and smile, Moore could light up a room at an instant.

“I don’t ever think I’ve not smiled or laughed around Coach Moore,” wrote former Virginia Wesleyan player Art Crew on Twitter. “Ever.”

That was the case for numerous folks that came in contact with him.

I came to a point where I did so many interviews with coaches that I would pretend to imitate them – in good fun, never with malice – with phrases that they would say. Some know of this, some don’t. But once Moore found out, he was like a kid in a candy store. He loved the impersonations, maybe more than anyone.

In fact, our relationship grew to a point where at an off-season event, summer league or even at the Fall League, he would wave me over. Sometimes, he’d introduce me to someone – it could be a referee, former player, anyone – and ask me on the spot to do an impersonation.

“Matt – give us your Boo Williams, your Jack Baker, Dave Macedo, Dennis Koutoufas, Darren Sanderlin,” … fill in the blank.

Every time, no matter how good or bad, he cracked up laughing. In fact, there were occasions where he’d ask me to do the impersonation of a specific person TO THAT PERSON! Talk about putting me on the spot, goodness! One case was Koutoufas, who actually found it humorous (much to my relief). Not long after, Dennis had me do my Koutoufas impersonation at the Norfolk Scope before tip-off to Willie Gause. Ben wasn’t there courtside, but certainly his spirit was.

Perhaps the biggest challenge was when Moore asked me, “Now Matt, I got a tough one for you… Can you do Ben Moore?” Not exactly a piece of cake.

Got the finger-waving down and the signature foot-stomp, but it took me some time to add in other elements. Hey, I’m far from comedian Frank Caliendo and there’s a reason I write and talk about sports instead of do jokes and comedy on stage. Moore had that distinct Queens (NY) accent and flavor to him. But it was a bit harder to get the full Moore down that I first envisioned.

Finally, I stumbled upon one of his favorite replies.

“No question.”

As you would expect, Ben loved it and found himself replying with that phrase, which tickled us all. It quickly got added to my internal playlist and memory bank whenever I was called upon to do my ‘routine,’ to break up the monotony of a rack of less than inspiring games at a Team Camp or Fall League night.

It took on a life of its own really. Ben and I often found each other exchanging text messages with the different ‘voices’ or things people would say, including his ‘No Question,’ line he often used.

I’ll miss being able to do one more impersonation for him, but I’m sure his influence will inspire in the future and make me smile every time someone provides his favorite reply.

Back on September 21st, I found my way re-routed to Darling Stadium for a football game between Menchville and Kecoughtan, two teams that missed the playoffs this year and it was not one that I had planned to check out that evening. After arriving literally seconds before kick-off and taking photographs on the sideline for the first quarter, I made my way to the opposite sideline.

Waving from the stands to me was none other than Ben Moore. Perfect, a chance to hang out with a good friend and take a night off. When you cover upwards of 30 football games a season, there are just some days where you need a reprieve.

Moore and I sat together and chatted for the remainder of the game. The final three periods flew by quicker than the first quarter that seemed to take an hour in my head. Moore was there rooting on the Monarchs, who would go on to win the game 23-14 in what was viewed at the time as a mild upset. What resonated with me was just how excited he was for Menchville to get the victory and for one of his basketball players, Charles Bibbs, to get on the field. He was like a proud papa.

Ben congratulated the players and coaches as they exited the field with a smile as wide as the Grand Canyon. We even chatted in the parking lot for close to an hour – sports, life in general, any topic. He told me he wasn’t sure how much longer he’d be coaching and that he’d like to do what I do; travel the state and cover games, plus do scouting.

I told Ben I might take him up on that and would be interested in adding a ‘Coach’s Clicker,’ type of segment to the site where someone with his expertise could break down film via the telestrator and bring a unique element that no one else offers. He loved the idea.

On October 8th, I made it a point to text him Happy Birthday. Ben replied.

“Yes I did, thanks Matt. God is good. Hope to see you Wednesday. Be blessed.”

That Wednesday, we’d see him and my buddy, Jimmy, would help him and Young out with the Fall League as the guys needed another clock operator. Jimmy obliged and Ben promised him he’d get him paid for helping.

Ben came through on his promise and called me to let me know he had Jimmy’s check; he could meet him at Virginia Wesleyan to get it to him. However, Jimmy noticed that a couple of the games he did were not reflected on the check. No big deal. But Ben, out of his own pocket and the goodness of his heart, gave him $20.

Amazing . . . but if you know Ben Moore, not surprising.

“A remarkable man and friend. Ben was a pillar in our profession and we don’t have many of them,” Young pointed out.

“Losing a guy like Ben hurts our profession, a lot. [He] stood for the elements that some have no clue about, such as integrity. Ben exemplified that, which is needed yet somewhat lost in the coaching profession. I really hope the Hampton Roads Fall League is renamed the Ben Moore Fall League.”

Young’s hope is shared by many.

A family man of faith, a guy with a love for basketball and a dedication for helping others…

That’s what Ben Moore was and will forever be remembered in my eyes.

Rest in Peace, Ben. I know you’re looking down on us from heaven, probably organizing some type of basketball event. I can’t wait to hopefully see you again one day.

No question.